Gracie Mac

It is not something I am capable to write about right now; my grief is currently too much to handle to get my thoughts in proper order. My doggie, Gracie, died unexpectedly on Thursday. She was five and a half years old and healthy and I don’t really know what was the cause of her death. She was my best friend, my child, my family – I was closer with her than I was to most people – and the loss of her is simply devastating.

There is so much I want to write about and say and so much I want to remember –about her life with me but even about the day she left. I need to do it for my grieving and I need to do it for her memory.

I love you, Gracie Mac. I don’t understand why you had to leave so soon. I don’t feel like our time together was supposed to be over already, but I am grateful for it, as short as it was. I have a million things I want to thank you for. I hope your time here was fun and adventurous and happy. I hope I was a good mom. I hope you are in a great place right now - a place where you can run free and play with other dogs; a place where human food drops down occasionally for you to scoop up; a place where you can chase all of the cats you want; a place where there are miles of sand and beach and shoreline for you to frolic and play fetch; a place where there is unlimited bodies of water for you to swim. I hope you are still the happiest dog I know, even without your mom. You have touched me and so many other people so deeply and taught us all more than we could have imagined – you will never be forgotten.

I miss you. I miss you down deep in my soul, in the core of my being, in every part of my body with a fierceness I can’t explain.

I love you, Girl.